So-called unsolvable conflicts bring with them stress, unease, disease, and unhappiness. The opposite of what most of us work towards achieving.
Ever heard the song ‘Should I stay or should I go’ from the punk rock band ‘the Clash’ ? Well, what the writers got wrong was to leave it to others, in his case ‘Darling’, to decide what he should do with his life. Instead of asking Darling he should be asking himself. Then he should make a decision and move on. Either staying with Darling and give their relationship his very best, or leave her and move on to other adventures.
If you got rid of your record player you can listen to the song here, as an inspiration as of what not to do:
The lyrics describe a typical conflict situation that most of us probably already experienced at least once this lifetime. And we continue to experience similar conflicts every day. These conflicts are what causes stress, and eventually chronic disease. So, whenever you feel stuck because you are in a conflict (with yourself), just make the choice. Pick one so that life again can flow. There’s no such thing as a ‘wrong choice’. Just make it. The choice, I mean. If you want to avoid illness and unhappiness, that is.
Maybe you heard about the dog and the leopard that got stuck in a bathroom together, for 7 hours? If you don’t know the story, you can read about it here.
Countless articles can be found on the internet, and also videos of the event. Most of the articles and videos depict the dog as a hero for managing to escape the ferocious leopard. Although we are happy that no animal (or human) was hurt during the 7 hours, we still can’t help rooting for the leopard. Not because we prefer cats to dogs (we don’t), or because we want to be contrary. But because the dog stayed in the conflict and the leopard didn’t!
Well, the dog was trembling and had to be carried out of the bathroom. He couldn’t even walk. (After 7 hours in a state of fear, who could?) The leopard on the other hand, saved her strength and escaped the moment she got a chance. She made the choice to accept the situation. She didn’t get distracted eating the dog. She didn’t lie in fear as the humans on the outside prepared an even worse trap for her. She made a choice. And then, as the roof got lifted off the building, she made another choice. And escaped.
Just like Bruce Lee in ‘Enter the dragon’. He knew already back in 1973. It’s time we all learned this. To avoid conflict. To be water.
Talk to you soon!
Ole and Linda